On a Certain Lady at Court

It is assumed that Alexander Pope wrote the following poem for a certain Catherine Howard, one of Queen Caroline's waiting-women and later the Countess of Suffolk. This is construed as his expression of the lady's numerous qualities and the way she shunned his praises and consequent advances toward her. My own understanding was rather different, and I probably like it better that way. The verses describe the image of a perfect woman, and an embodiment of an ideal human being. Not dissecting it too much. Sharing it because it struck a chord somewhere.

ON A CERTAIN LADY AT COURT

I know a thing that's most uncommon;

(Envy, be silent and attend!)

I know a reasonable woman,

Handsome and witty, yet a friend.

Not warp'd by passion, aw'd by rumour;

Not grave through pride, nor gay through folly;

An equal mixture of good-humour

And sensible soft melancholy.

'Has she no faults then (Envy says), Sir?'

Yes, she has one, I must aver:

When all the world conspires to praise her,

The woman's deaf, and does not hear.

~

Alexander Pope

Random It Is

In their constant quest to grab attention, marketers have been known to resort to various tactics. One of them is devising catchy brand names. One day, as I glanced through the aisles of a supermarket (will not name) a series of apparently innovative and seemingly interesting brand names caught my attention. It was the detergent section. After the Henkos, Ariels, Prils and other biggies came a few not so well known ones - these were manufactured by the company that owns the supermarket in question. The eye-catching names were: Mopz - the phenoyl, Scrubz - the utensil detergent gel, Floorz - some floor cleaning agent. Excruciatingly creative.

Bemused at this, I thought about the unrestrained use of the letter 'Z' these days. "Hellozzzz" and the likes. Annoying to the core, but they seem to have caught up with the times, and left me feeling quite uneasy. Nevertheless, my curiosity led me to look up the words that end with the letter Z and are really a part of the English language; eventually I did find a whole bunch of them. In the process I also realised that some brand names really had a meaning. Quite a welcome surprise, should I say! Thank you Mopz and Scrubz and Floorz for enlightening me. So far I could only think of 'zig zag', 'zip-zam-zoom', 'bar-mitzvah' and a little more (being modest here of course) when it came to the utility of the last letter of the English alphabet.

The curious minds reading this can access the list of these holy wordzz here!

~

Somewhere In a Parallel Universe

"Her heart was a secret garden and the walls were very high."
~
William Goldman, The Princess Bride

Can you spot the lonely soul that moves in the throngs? It is out there for everyone to see, yet for no one to notice. It lives with everybody around, yet does not. If you peer into its eyes you'd know. But it never lets you. It was an involuntary infliction; it is now a vicious circle. The soul was left desolate by someone it loved. Now it wards off everyone who could love it, and more so everyone who it could love back. For once bitten is twice shy and so the lonely soul  keeps away even a little shard that could reach its vulnerability. Its only weapon is the façade it maintains to shield its private world. That façade of unwavering fortitude, the imperturbable sang froid, that stoic visage. It's been so long that it is now adept at concealing that tumultuous whirlpool within. From insomnia to hypersomnia, binge eating to bulimia nervosa, nothing provides it the least quantum of solace. Homeless in its own heart, it continues to seek a haven in a world that, it seems, will never be its own again.

~

Sunscreen

I first heard 'Sunscreen' on the radio many years ago. Around 3 years back an instructor at a coaching centre that I used to attend dedicated this song to the batch I belonged to. It was a thoughtful gesture from her to bid us farewell and wish us well. This was perhaps my best takeaway from that class. It does me good to go back to it every once in a while.

(Baz Luhrmann's adaptation of an article by Mary Schmich - 'Advice, like youth, probably just wasted on the young'.)

~

Food for Thought

There is something wrong with every seemingly perfect picture, just as there is something remarkable about every spoiled one.
~
MS

Cold Feet

My craving for winters this year is finally being attended to, a little late but nevertheless. With the sudden fall in the mercury, a sudden realisation has also dawned upon, or bounced back should I say - my abnormal intolerance to low temperatures. Despite being clad in my warmest jacket, the cold is getting to my bones. The blanket and quilt are my best friends now. With all my joints stiff, and fingers and toes crooked besides being stone cold one morning, I try to crawl out of the bed. I really deserve an award for doing that, by the way. There is no water in the bottle on the bedside table. In fact all the 3 water bottles in my room are empty. Ergo my attempts at thawing myself, with a glass of warm water, are thwarted. The kettle does not come with its own water faucet, sadly. As I make my way to the water filter, the sudden exposure kick starts the first installment of the sneeze fest for the day. In the process, I pull a muscle in my lumbar. After that, every bout of cough that I face hurts my back first, and throat later. As I limp my way back to the room, my head begins to freeze and ear begins to hurt. Lesson learnt: a lot more insulation needed henceforth. But until then, be kind to me old age!

~

the Inamorato who was. . .

I hold it true whate'er befall;
I feel it, when I sorrow most;
'Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.
~
Alfred Lord Tennyson

Tongue Out!

"My childhood may be over, but that doesn't mean playtime is.  "

~

Ron Olson

Laugh Out Loud

As a child, I was very fond of McDonald's Happy Meal toys; more than the 'meal' itself. Even as I grew older the fascination remained and, as a matter of fact, remains till date. I'd be on the lookout for the toys every week; especially for ensemble sets. One particular time, when I was in college, the Madagascar team was up for collection. Having established the background, I go in one day to pick up the toy of the week - Alex the lion.

Guy Behind the Counter: Hi, what would you like?

Me: Hi, I'd like a Happy Meal.

GBTC: Oh sure! Veg or Non veg?

Me: Vegetarian.

GBTC (putting Marty the Zebra, a toy that I already had, into the Happy Meal bag): Give me a minute.

Me: Excuse me, could you give me Alex instead?

GBTC: I'm sorry?

Me:  I said, could you give me Alex instead?

GBTC: Is there a problem?

Me: Yes, I want Alex.

GBTC: Ma'am I'm very sorry once again.

Me (confused): What is wrong?

GBTC: Ma'am, you'll have to bear with me for the time being. Alex is not here now. He'll come over only in the night shift.

The rest is history.

~

In a Fleeting Moment

The train reached the station exactly seven minutes late. That was equivalent to a millennium when she was running late for her college - which was very often. Her college was a good ten-minute walk from the station and she had to reach class in two and a half. She could never depend on her luck to find an auto rickshaw too; especially when she was in dire need of it. But before that she needed to wiggle her way through a swarm of crazy women trying to embark the train, and then run up forty steps on the staircase simultaneously dodging the nudges and pushes from the multitude of people at the station running around in all possible directions. It was a usual Monday morning in Mumbai. 

As she counted the fortieth step, she was puffing with breathlessness while trying to protect her bag and herself from the hostile passers by on the foot over bridge. Her feet were impeccably trained and before she knew they had turned toward the exit. That is when she first saw him. They were walking in opposite directions. She was barely short of sprinting, and he too moved on at a steady pace. As they crossed, she risked walking on the bridge with her turned around to watch him until he was out of her sight. He, on the other hand, was trying to grasp the world as much as he could while trying to keep pace with his master. The master callously tugged at the chain that was tightly fastened around the monkey's neck. She watched them cross a trash pile, where the master cunningly steered the monkey closer to the heap. The primate took the cue and lunged forward. Like a pro he picked up a couple of rotting pieces of food and began to nibble at them hungrily.

It was a matter of seconds, but that monkey's plight had pierced her heart like a warm knife would through butter. Her feet kept moving, but her mind remained transfixed on what she had witnessed. The next few minutes seemed to go by in a jiffy. Mechanically, she hailed an auto rickshaw (which she found after some struggle - usual story), reached college, ran up six storeys - around 144 steps - and made it to class totally out of breath and sanity, but just in time. It is important to attend class - she was instructed all the time - come what may; the world and its problems could go take a hike. She took her seat at the end of a row, but nobody noticed that she had actually stayed behind on that foot over bridge at the station.

~